Earlier this evening Rachel and I went out to celebrate her birthday. This may sound weird but it was fun for us, we went to the whole foods store and grabbed a pizza together. We had a wonderful time. Sometimes I can't help but hear other people's conversations about nothing in particular and I wonder what really drives people day in and day out. Sometimes in my heart I am passing judgment on people without even realizing it, thats when God or my dear sweet wife puts me in check reminding me that I'm not all that. This is true. C.S. Lewis once wrote about Pride or Self-Conceit saying, "THe more we have it in ourselves, the more we dislike it in other people." In other words when anybody starts passing judgment onto other people we need to be careful to look in the mirror first, and do a little self examining before we think we are better than anybody else.
I think I had one of those moments tonight. I am sitting here thinking to myself, "Who do I think I am to really pass judgment on someone I do not even know?" That never really benefits anyone no matter where your coming from. In fact that is just the kind of attitude that makes many Christians to look very arrogent, when we are called to be people who are loving others as Christ has loved us.
So as our evening continued we went out to the mall. Which for the two of us is a real rarity. I truly was mesmorized by all that was going on around us. There were so many things to just lure us into different stores. I realized just how simply human I am. The truth sometimes really has a way of bring itself to light when we get too full of ourselves. Everytime this happens I struggle within myself because I know that I never want to be a pompous and proud Bible thumper that simply just pushes people away. Deep in my heart I want to encourage people with the love that Christ has put in my heart. Unfortunately that does not always come through.
Anyway, as we were strolling about the mall amidst all the commercialized craziness of the local mall there was a girl working in a kiosk. She was selling a black magic box. Well, again my first gut reaction is well I don't mess with that kind of stuff. All she wanted to do was show us a card trick. So, I spit out my pride and let her show us her card trick. It was one of those pick a card any card tricks, and sure enough she new what my card was. I have to say it was impressive. It was pretty cool. We then thanked her and went on her way. For some reason though something burning in me wanted to go back and just pray for her for some reason. Of course in this day and age that is becoming a social taboo for anyone nowadays. We just kept on walking and went home. The thing that keeps eating at my heart is this question, "If I really believe what I say I believe why am I afraid to share that with people?" Did I just miss an opportunity to share Christ with somebody? When is it apprpiate to share the Gospel? What will it take for me not to be ashamed to share my faith. How can I do this without pushing people away? At the moment I do not have any real clear answers. Nevertheless, Christ is doing a work in this area of my life, where opportunities like this will continue to come up. I can only pray that Christ will give me the strength to speak the words He would have me share with someone. Not to cram the Gospel down someone's throat, but to simply encourage and lift others up with the hope that Christ will speak for Himself in these different moments.
So there are some of my random thoughts for the evening hoping that each of us continue to grow in Him.
